Personal growth · Individual therapy · Chicago
Therapy for Personal Boundaries in Chicago
You may agree to something while already knowing you do not have the capacity for it. Afterwards, guilt can compete with resentment, leaving you unsure how to respond differently next time.
Request a consultation
What you may be noticing
- Saying yes automatically
- Feeling responsible for others’ reactions
- Explaining a limit repeatedly
Your experience may look different. These examples are starting points for a conversation.
How we can work on this
We can identify your needs, consider which limits fit the situation, and practice expressing them clearly. We can also explore what comes up when someone is disappointed, while keeping your safety and circumstances in view.
I am Sam Rustum, LCPC. My work is collaborative: we will discuss your priorities, choose a starting point, and check whether our approach is useful to you.
Making a limit specific enough to use
Wanting more space can be clear in your mind and difficult to express in a relationship. You may hint, hope the person notices, or explain until the original limit disappears. We can work toward a statement that communicates what you are actually able or willing to do.
For example, you might want to help a family member while keeping part of the day for yourself. A session could involve deciding what you can offer, practicing the wording, and discussing what you will do if the request continues. We can also explore the fear of being seen as selfish or uncaring.
A useful boundary depends on your circumstances, including shared obligations, dependence, culture, and safety. We will consider those realities when choosing a step. The work may overlap with feeling entitled to have needs or availability expectations at work. Progress can include noticing your preference sooner and following through on a limit you have chosen.
Questions you may be asking
What if someone becomes disappointed?
We can consider how to acknowledge the reaction while staying clear about what you can offer. Another person's disappointment can be difficult to tolerate, and it may bring up familiar fears. We can work with those feelings and plan realistic follow-through.
Does a boundary mean ending the relationship?
Many boundaries concern time, topics, responsibilities, or the way you communicate within an ongoing relationship. We can discuss the limit you need and what it would require. Decisions about continued contact deserve attention to the specific circumstances.
Can I set a boundary when I depend on someone?
Dependence affects the choices and risks involved. We can take your financial, practical, emotional, and safety concerns seriously. A starting point may be clarifying your needs, finding support, or choosing a modest change that fits your situation.
A place to begin
Let’s make room for what you need.
A free 15-minute consultation gives us a chance to talk about what is difficult, answer your questions, and consider whether working together fits what you need.