Sam Rustum, LCPC · Chicago & online
Acceptance and Commitment Therapy in Chicago
ACT offers ways to make room for difficult thoughts and feelings while taking steps toward what matters to you. You do not need to eliminate every uncomfortable emotion before you can move forward.
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What we can practice
- Noticing thoughts without automatically following them
- Making room for emotions rather than battling them
- Paying attention to the present moment
- Clarifying your values
- Taking manageable actions that reflect those values
From getting stuck to having options
You may notice that trying to control every thought or feeling takes up more and more of your life. We can explore what happens when you relate to those experiences with a little more distance and flexibility.
This might involve mindfulness exercises, discussing a difficult choice, or identifying a small step toward an important relationship or goal.
Acceptance is not resignation
Making room for an internal experience does not mean approving of a harmful situation or giving up on change. We can distinguish what you can influence from what you cannot control, then focus on choices that matter to you.
Your values guide the work. We will adjust the pace and practices together.
Practice making choices with room for uncertainty
You may be waiting to feel confident before speaking up, less anxious before making a decision, or completely certain before changing direction. While you wait, important parts of life can stay on hold. Acceptance and commitment therapy, usually called ACT, explores how to make room for uncomfortable thoughts and feelings while choosing actions that reflect your values. I’m Sam Rustum, LCPC. We can use ACT to examine where the struggle with your inner experience is getting in the way of the life you want.
Notice what your mind is asking you to do
A thought such as ‘I will disappoint everyone’ can feel like an instruction. You might work late, cancel your plans, or avoid a conversation to keep that possibility away. We can practice noticing the thought as a thought and consider what happens when you automatically follow it.
This may involve a brief attention exercise, a different way of describing a familiar worry, or simply slowing down together. We will use language and practices that make sense to you. Being distracted or uncomfortable gives us something to work with.
Clarify what matters in this particular choice
Values can be easy to name in the abstract and harder to recognize on a busy Tuesday. What would being a present partner look like tonight? How do you want to handle a disagreement? What does being a thoughtful professional mean when several people want more than you can give?
We can separate the qualities you want to bring to your life from the goals you hope to reach. Then we can identify one action you are willing to take, even with some worry or doubt alongside you.
Make room for feelings and respond to your circumstances
Acceptance concerns your willingness to experience what is happening inside you. It does not require staying in an unsafe relationship, accepting an unreasonable workload, or ignoring something you can change. We can consider practical limits, available support, and the consequences of different choices.
As you practice, we will ask whether your responses are helping you participate in the parts of life that matter. The work can change as your circumstances and priorities change.
Work with competing priorities
Sometimes two choices each reflect something important. Caring for family and protecting time to recover can pull in different directions. We can examine what is possible this week, what tradeoffs you are willing to make, and when to revisit the decision. A values-based choice still has consequences; part of our work can be making space for them.
Questions you may be asking
Do I have to meditate?
No. Attention practices can be brief and ordinary, such as noticing your feet on the floor or returning to a conversation after your mind wanders. We can discuss what feels useful and choose alternatives when a practice does not suit you.
What if I do not know what my values are?
That is a workable starting point. We can look at moments you felt connected, situations you regret, people you admire, or choices that feel important. Values often become clearer through specific experiences and small actions, rather than through finding a perfect list.
Can ACT help with a decision I keep revisiting?
We can explore what information you need, what remains uncertain, and which direction fits your priorities. ACT can provide a way to examine repeated attempts to feel completely certain. The decision remains yours, and we can make space for the feelings that come with it.
A place to begin
Let’s make room for what you need.
A free 15-minute consultation gives us a chance to talk about what is difficult, answer your questions, and consider whether working together fits what you need.